2005.01.01 - Sp1at - Dizzy Reed Humours Sp1at

Dizzy Reed humours Splat

1) Did the lack of 'Darrens' in the world of Rock Music inspire you to change your name to Dizzy?

DR) I was in a band with a drummer named Aaron. Having an Aaron and a Darren in the same band sounded gay. Ironically, when I joined Guns, we had an Izzy and a Dizzy.

2) According to the internet, you were born in at least three separate locations at the same time. To your knowledge, have you ever been investigated by NASA or the Secret Services?

DR) It’s to throw everyone off. I am from a planet called Zetron.

3) Now Buckethead has left Guns n'roses, are you worried that Axl Rose is going to expect you to do an extended bongo solo and some robotic dancing during live shows to fill in for his absence?

DR) I will miss those piss breaks.

4) To old ladies, Mr Dizzy Reed, you are an wicked rock star who eats small mammal live on stage with your evil spiked tongue. Do you think old ladies see the world like it really is?

DR) Fortunately, I am close enough to the pyro to cook the mammals before I eat them on stage. As far as the spiked tongue goes. Well ladies old and young will tell you......

5) If your daughter bought home Johnny Kelly of Type O Negative and announced they were to marry the next day, what would your initial reaction be?

DR) I’ve always stated as such: You bring home a musician, I give him a chance to play whatever instrument it is that he plays. If he sucks, it’s the highway. If he’s good, then I put him to work. Johnny is one of the best drummers I have ever played with. He can pull off any song we pull up on the spot. He would be a keeper.

6) MTV are looking for a new wacky family to take over from the Osbournes. Would you be up for it?

DR) $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

7) Is it true that you write all of Lisa Reed's books but let her get the glory for it?

DR) No, but I hope I am some sort of inspiration. It’s kind of weird though when she calls out the names of her characters during...

8) Do you consider yourself to be more or less famous than Vanilla Ice?

DR) Ice Ice baby. Come on!!!! He is far more “Famous”. Same with vanilla. And ice (except in Europe where it doesn’t exist).

9) Where is Axl Rose?

DR) Ah, the eternal question. The eternal answer: I don’t know. (“Barfly” 1987)

10) What are you plans for 2005?

DR) Live like there’s no tomorrow. Or 2006. Remember Y2K?

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