2004.05.24 - The Howard Stern Show - Interview with Velvet Revolver

The edited-down TV version that was aired on June 12, 2004 (thanks to @Surge for sending it to us!)



Transcript of the full interview:
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[Pre-show interview outside the studio:

Are you guys ready for this?

Scott: We’re ready. We’re on tour right now. We’re well-oiled, well-lubed. Lubed. Sex machine.

What’s the name of your new album?

Scott: Contraband.]

---------------

Stern: Look who I’m sitting here with. These guys sound better – I was just listening to them in, like, rehearsal.

Quivers: In rehearsal?

Stern: I gotta join this band...

Quivers: This is your band.

Stern: It’s a good looking band. It’s a cool band. See, how do I work these mics? What do I got to do? It should be working.

Quivers: So what’s happening?

Stern: Say something, Scott.

Scott: Right here.

Stern: I’ll talk to you first, then I’ll come to the other dudes.  Are you blending in with this band or are you sometimes accidentally calling them Stone Temple Pilots?

Scott: No, man. We... We’re Velvet Revolver. A rock ‘n’ roll band.

Stern: Now let me get this straight: what happened was, you were in Stone Temple Pilots last time I looked around.

Scott: Yeah, that was about – last time I was here was about two and a half years ago?

Stern: Right. You were with those guys, but they were a pain in the ass because they freaked out every time you went into rehab. Do I have that right?

Scott: (Chuckles) Yeah, I don’t know, I just - it seemed like every time I turned around I was in the back of a cop car, but ... You know, you’re the only person who can get away with asking me those questions anymore.

Stern: Well, it’s so fascinating. You know what I mean? And what is the new band’s policy? They’re like, “Hey, we love you when you’re in rehab”? (?)

Scott: I think we’ve all spent a lot of time, every one of us, in rehab.

Stern: Has everyone been in rehab in Guns N’ Roses, pretty much?

Quivers: I think that’s where they met.

Stern: Is that where you...

Slash: I think we’ve all been in rehab, yeah.

Matt: Scott and I were roommates.

Stern: Were you guys roommates?

Matt: We were roommates, yeah. We-

Stern: In rehab?

Matt: Yeah.

Stern: No kidding!

Matt: There was four bunk beds, when there was two guys from, like, the high desert, like out near riverside (?), speed freak guys, and then me and Scott.

Stern: Matt, what were you on?

Matt: I liked cocaine.

Stern: So you were on coke...

Matt: Yeah.

Stern: Scott was on heroin... So you guys-

Matt: Cocaine and tequila was my combo platter.

Stern: Right. So you guys said, “Hey, wait a second. We’ll take you to be in our band, because what do we care? We know what it’s like.”

Matt: (Laughs)

Stern: Slash, were you ever in rehab?

Slash: Yeah, I went once.

(Laughter)

Stern: What were you in there for?

Slash: Well, I was in for heroin, too, but I was only there for a limited amount of time, because I decided, “I’m not this fucked up,” you know - oh [bleep].

Stern: (Laughs).

Quivers: No, don’t follow it up with that word either!

Slash: I’m sorry – I’m sorry – I’m sorry.

Quivers: (Laughs).

Stern: You were in-

Slash: I went for a little while and then I straightened myself out.

Stern: What a hip rehab facility!

Slash: Well, they wouldn’t let me out. I had to force myself out.

Stern: Oh, I see.

Quivers: You escaped.

Stern: Alright. So Slash was in rehab, Matt was in rehab...

Quivers: We know Duff was (laughs).

Stern: Duff, you were definitely in rehab, right?

Duff: Yeah, you’ve seen the before and after.

Stern: Dude, you look good, incredibly (?)

Quivers: You look great!

Stern: Like you’ve been working out or something.

Duff: Yeah, same old thing.

Stern: Yeah, you look good. You look good, man.

Duff: Thanks.

Stern: And what were you in rehab for?

Duff: Oh, I ended up in the hospital. My pancreas blew up.

Stern: Oh, yeah. Yeah, amen to that.

Quivers: How do you do that? (laughs).

Duff: You abuse it for a long time.

Stern: What was your drugs? Heroin?

Duff: No. A lot of cocaine, a lot of pills and a lot of alcohol.

Quivers: Wow!

Stern: Was it cool when your pancreas blew up? (chuckles)

Duff: It was not cool at all (chuckles).

Quivers: Could you feel it? I mean, does it make a loud sound?

Duff: Robin, it’s... Yeah, third degree burns on the inside of your-

Quivers: Ugh!

Stern: Wow!

Duff: Real quick.

Stern: Scott’s a piker compared to you.

Slash: I gotta add that Dave Kushner over here is pretty much the sponsor for the whole band (laughs).

(Laughter)

Stern: Dave, have you ever been in rehab?

Dave Kushner: Actually, I haven’t.

Stern: You haven’t.

Dave: I’m the only one they’ve got, you know, straightened out.

Stern: You’re high now.

Dave: Yeah.

Stern: Alright.

(Laughter)

Stern: So is everybody off everything now? I mean, is everybody straight now?

Quivers: Everybody clean?

Scott: Yeah, you know what, actually we’re all now members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

(Laughter – Inaudible cross talk)

Stern: Scott, you don’t sound straight (laughs).

Scott: You know what, that’s the thing. That’s the reason why we’re able to be out here touring and doing what we’re doing, it’s because we are all clean and-

Stern: But let me ask your new band-

Quivers: Anybody got a chip? How many chips do we have?

Stern: If Scott – let me ask the other band this: Hey, Slash, if Scott has to go back into rehab, are you gonna dump him from the band or you gonna stick with him, unlike Stone Temple Pilots?

Scott: I’m never going back into rehab.

Stern: You’re not?

Scott: I’m never getting loaded again.

Stern: You‘ve said that so much.  

Scott: This is, like, the way my life is – you know, what it’s gonna be now.

Stern: Scott, I love you, but even I don’t believe you. I don’t believe you.

Scott: Hey... Hey...

Slash: I’ve seen you every-

Stern: Every time Scott comes in he tells me that.

Slash: Right. Well, you know, all things considered, I’ve seen-

Scott: You know, I kicked my habit a year ago-

Stern: Did you really?

Scott: And then I’m just not going back into that.

Stern: Yeah... Well, after this appearance you might want to. You never know.

(Laughter)

Stern: After I get through with you.

Scott: Besides, I want to get one thing clear. You mentioned earlier, when we were back in the room, that my wife and I are divorced. We’re not divorced. We decided not to.

Quivers: Oh really?

Scott: You know, I went through major things and I decided I needed to become a man. That was one thing different than before when I was sober for a couple of years and the woman made me jump through hoops to get her back, and I had to go to hell with the squirt gun, literally, and-

Stern: What do you mean you had to go to a squirt gun?

Quivers: To hell with the squirt gun.

Stern: Alright (?).

Scott: And, you know, it was definitely - we took a lot more than getting sober.

Stern: She gave you the ultimatum and then, like-

Scott: It was more than that.

Stern: She moved out.

Scott: It wasn’t just about getting sober.

Stern: Right.

Quivers: You had to fix everything.

Scott: It was a lot more than that. I mean, I kicked my habit a year ago and...

Stern: What did she make you do?

Scott: We just got it together a couple of months ago.

Stern: What did you have to do? What did you have to do, like, no more other women and stuff?

Scott: No, it’s just a lot more than that, so-

Stern: No drugs?

Scott: I just wanted to clear that up, because I heard you say that we’re divorcing.

Stern: Well, I’m glad you are together.  

Slash: And I’m divorced but I’m remarried with somebody else.

Stern: No kidding!

Quivers: Wow!

Slash: It’s been a while since I talked to you last. I’ve been married, I’ve got a second kid on the way.

Stern: You’re kidding! So this is a different hot chick.

Slash: Huh? (laughs) Yeah, a Cuban hot chick. (?)

Quivers: You know, Slash could be on the next divorce (laughs).

Stern: Yeah, we don’t know who you’re married to. The hot chick you were married to in my movie, you’re done with her.

Slash: That was Renee, yeah.

Stern: We’re done with her.

Slash: Yeah. And then-

Stern: How come you got rid of her? Was she a pain?

Slash: You know what, I don’t think I was ready for that.

Stern: Alright. Me neither.

Slash: And she wasn’t crazy enough. Whatever the deal, I don’t know (laughs). You know how that goes.

Stern: If you see her, tell her I’m ready for her. Alright.

Slash: Alright. I’ve not seen her since, and then I’ve been remarried for a couple of years.

Stern: No kidding.

Quivers: Oh, have you?!

Slash: And I’ve got a 20 month old baby, and I’ve got another one coming.

Stern: Who’s the new chick? A new model?

Slash: No, she’s – well, that’s what they say, but she’s a lot more than that.

Stern: Really?

Slash: Yeah.

Stern: I’d like to meet her.

Quivers: She’s a scientist as well as a model.

Stern: Is she really? Is she a scientist?

Slash: In her own way, because she puts up with my ass (laughs).

Stern: So now, when Axl left the band, nobody understood that. That was crazy, right? But now you’ve got Scott. Scott is a great frontman.

Slash: Let me get one thing straight on that one.

Stern: Go ahead.

Slash: The band sort of left Axl.

Stern: Okay.

Slash: He just kept the name. And then we’re not all really – like, Duff and I were original members and we recruited Matt because he was the best drummer in the world.

Stern: Right.

Slash: Originally he was in the Cult.

Stern: Right. By the way, great band!

Quivers: Yeah!

Stern: Great – you know.

Slash: By the time Guns N’ Roses and Matt came together, it was almost on the way out.

Stern: Matt, what happened to the Cult? I don’t understand-

Matt: Ian Astbury is singing with the Doors now. You’ve heard about that, right?

Stern: No. But that band was so – they never hit it really big. I don’t get it.

Matt: Um, I don’t know.

Stern: That was some of the best music I ever heard! Do you guys understand that?

Matt: We had a lot of fun. Ian’s lyrics were a little, maybe, over one’s head, you know, in America or something. I don’t know.

Someone: They didn’t really get it out in the Midwest.

Stern: Yeah.

Slash: My point was, it’s not Scott joining Guns N’ Roses. It’s nothing like that.

Stern: Okay. Everybody coming to the table. Now, Scott, what happened with you and Stone Temple Pilots? I mean, those guys – what’s really going on there?

Scott: Well, there were just years and years of us going through... like, loving each other and then there’ve been, I think, a lot of jealousy at times, and then there were periods of us using drugs together, and then there were periods of-

Stern: When you were just using.

Scott: Yeah, when a couple of people would clean up, and then I would be getting loaded by myself, and then I would clean up, and then we would get loaded together, and then... like a cycle going on and on.

Stern: If you guys had just all gotten loaded together all the time, it might have worked out.

Quivers: Yeah, you gotta be all on schedule.

Scott: We might have been all a happy family, but-

Stern: Are those guys mad now that you’re with this new band?

Scott: You know what? Actually, we went through a period on our last tour where it got really bad, and then I didn’t speak to them for a long time. Then we started this band and then, when we were recording our album, Velvet Revolver, Robert and Dean happened to be producing the Alien Ant Farm album – the latest one – and they were in the room right next to us at NRG Recording Studios. It was really an uncomfortable situation, obviously. So, finally, I just decided that, you know what, I have to be the man in this situation, and-

Stern: You have to commit to one band or another.

Scott: No, no. I have to go over and make amends to them-

Stern: Oh!

Scott: And, you know, kind of own up to my side of the street, because the last time that I saw them was in the dressing room and it almost turned into a fistfight between Dean and I. So-

Stern: That would have been cool. Who would have won the fight?

Scott: I wrote a letter to him, and got the letter to him, and just really apologized from the bottom of my heart. And he ended up coming up to me, and saying, you know, “Everything that you said is exactly the way I felt,” and we gave each other a hug, and we spoke, we talked about it for a long time, and really cleared the air. Then, the next day, Robert came up to me and then we basically shared the same sentiments. That made me feel really good and I think they felt the same way. So that was about seven or eight months ago.

Stern: Have you heard from them since?

Quivers: Is he still in Stone Temple Pilots?

Scott: You know, Mary and their wives speak very frequently, and-

Stern: So there’s no animosity.

Scott: No, not any longer.

Stern: So you’re still in Stone Temple Pilots.

Scott: You know what, I don’t really...

Stern: Who knows!

Scott: Who knows, but if that will ever happen again like anything way down the road – but I just can’t really see that happening. And this is an actual band. This isn’t a one-off project, Velvet Revolver. This is a band that we plan on having a long career for. I plan on this being the thing that I close out my rock and roll life with.

Stern: Wow. Alright. That’s a cool commitment. What is it, Gary?

Gary: I’ve got a question for the guys from Guns N’ Roses. When you guys saw Axl on the MTV Awards a couple of years ago with that band and that Buckethead thing, were you guys embarrassed by it?

Slash: I didn’t see it.

Gary: You’ve never seen it.

Slash: I refuse to see it.

Duff: I saw it like a year later.

Gary: Why do you refuse to see it?

Duff: I was going to school at the time, and having kids, and I just didn’t see it.

Stern: What kind of school?!

Quivers: You were going to school?

Duff: Yeah, I went to a nice Jesuit school.

Stern: Jesuit?!

Duff: Yeah.

Quivers: What, high school?

Duff: (Laughing) No. Yeah, right? Thanks, Robin.

Stern: What kind of school? What were you studying? What were you trying to learn?

Duff: Finance.

Stern: Oh really?

Duff: Yeah.

Quivers: You’re gonna be a businessman?!  

(Laughter)

Duff: I am a businessman.

Someone: I’d like to go over my portfolio with Duff.

(Laughter)

Duff: So I saw it a year later.

Stern: Slash, why do you refuse to see it?

Slash: You know, it was one of those things where I got a bunch of phone calls one morning, leaving me messages going, “What was that whole thing about on TV?” and I didn’t know what anybody was – you know, what it was.

Stern: Yeah, what is that?

Slash: Well, so I called-

Stern: Why couldn’t he be with you guys? I don’t understand.

Slash: I’d been gone for a while, Duff had been gone for a while, Matt had been gone for a while. It was over with. When it finally ended, it was like a no-turning-back kind of thing. So when I heard what it was, it was the MTV Awards and I heard the reaction from the people that saw it, I didn’t want to see something,  I didn’t want to leave - you know, I have that memory of whatever Guns N’ Roses was. When I left it was still sort of cool.

Duff: Yeah.

Stern: Right. Yeah, I think it’s over for that, right?

Duff: Our memories are pretty good.

Stern: It was a great band. Great band! I gotta get more ink. What have you guys got, major ink.

Quivers: See, as soon as you see guys who are all tatted up, you think you need to do that too.

Stern: Sometimes my (?) goes horribly wrong.

(Laughter)

Slash: I don’t have a tattoo of myself on my ass, by the way. I don’t know where you heard that.

Stern: Who said that you had...

Someone: On your arm.

Stern: I said on your arm, it’s a tattoo of you.

Slash: No, no. It’s a chick, her name’s Shirley. She’s sort of my alter ego, I think.

Stern: So you’re sticking with the wife? You’re not having sex with anybody else, huh?

Slash: I’ve been 100% monogamous.

Stern: Wow, look at you.

Slash: I know. Isn’t that funny?

Stern: That’s crazy!

Someone: It’s a little depressing.

Quivers: But have you been on the road? (laughs)

Slash: Huh? Yeah, yeah.

Stern: Right.

Slash: This is gonna be our seventh gig on Wednesday, right?

Quivers: Okay!

Matt: They all live vicariously through me. I’m the only single guy (laughs).

Stern: Wow. And you guys aren’t doing anything? You guys don’t even do mushrooms or anything?

Slash: No, no (laughs). The last thing-

Matt: (Laughs).

Stern: You’re kidding me!

Slash: The last thing-

Stern: Sure you’re allowed to do mushrooms, aren’t you?

Scott: Nothing, man.

Stern: Really?

Scott: I have to say that-

Stern: It’s crazy!

Scott: The judge and the D.A. were gracious to allow me to tour, and every single show day I have to do a urine analysis.

Quivers: Are you kidding?!

Scott: Every single show day.

Stern: Dude, you know you’re hardcore when a judge and a D.A. have to let you go on tour.

Scott: That’s the truth, man!

Stern: Right.

Quivers: But can you imagine having to go in a cup before you go on stage every night?

Stern: Yeah, that’s true.

Stern: During the show day, at some point during the day, I have to fuckin’ do the old...

Quivers: Wow!

Slash: With all due respect to Scott, man, he’s been through a lot to get to this point where we’re all here together right now.

Quivers: Yeah, he has. And Slash-

Scott: You’re the only person that I’m talking to about this, because I’ve been so fucking [bleep] – Uh... I know you - sorry.

Stern: “Effing”. Effing.    

Scott: You know I’m so “effing” sick of talking about this stuff that I just refuse.

Stern: What, with drugs and everything?

Scott: Yeah, you know, it’s just...

Stern: Well, you gotta talk to me about it, man.

Scott: You know, you and I have a long relationship.

Stern: You know what, though? I’m fascinated by lives out of control. Like, to me, I have such, like... My father used to yell at me every day, and it’d be like – he would say to me, “You got the whole world by the balls. How did these guys...” He’d always tell me, “How did these guys throw it all away for drugs?” But then I went and did drugs anyway.

Quivers: But you didn’t get messed up.

Stern: No. I always have my father’s voice in my head going, “Oh man, I can’t screw things up.”  

Quivers: You take two drinks a week and you go, “Oh, I gotta go to rehab.” (laughs)

Stern: Yeah, I start taking drinks and I think I’m addicted.

Someone: Well, I’m just fearing that-

Stern: I’ve got some weird governor in me that doesn’t allow me to do it. Almost like Robocop - you know, that one thing that he couldn’t kill that guy, because he had built into him? That’s me with drinking, I always get scared. Or drugs.

Slash: You’d be a crazy drunk anyway, so that’s alright.

Stern: Oh, you should see me when I’m drunk, man.

Slash: I can see you. From this vantage point, you look like you’ve been here for about 18-19 months.

(Laughter)

Slash: I could see you with a bottle of Jim Beam right there.

Stern: Yeah...

Slash: And Robin, you’d be in trouble.

Stern: Aren’t I a happy drunk already?

Someone: You are the happiest drunk I’ve ever met in my life. You just start laughing on everything.

Quivers: He’s like a baby, like a retarded baby (laughs).

Slash: So it’s more than twice a week, though.

Stern: Scott, what are you like when you’re high? Are you like a retarded baby like me or are you different?  Are you mean and aggressive?

Scott: No, I’m not. You know, somehow I always land on my feet.

Stern: Right. Do you miss it?

Scott: No, I don’t miss it at all, actually. It’s just a bad memory.

Stern: I know Slash does.

Slash: I don’t.

Stern: You don’t miss it?

Slash: It took me a long time to get to that point, too. But finally, after enough of what you’d call relapses and going “you know what?” the morning after - “it’s just not working.”

Stern: You don’t even drink?

Slash: I still drink a little bit.

(Laughter)

Stern: That’s what I thought.

Slash: I was talking about the dope, you know?

Stern: Right.

Someone: I’m just fearing the day when my pancreas blows up.

(Laughter)

Stern: Yeah, you always got a drink (?)

Quivers: You didn’t know about that, huh?

Someone: Yeah, I’ve never heard of that happening.

Stern: Already had 500 Jack on waters in Vegas.

Quivers: And ten million shots of tequila.

Someone: Las Vegas.

Gary: I’ve got a question for the Guns N’ Roses guys. You guys must have been offered loads of money to do, like, a reunion. Do you guys even talk to Axl anymore? Would you ever perform with him again?

Slash: No.

Duff: No.

Gary: No way.

Slash: I don’t think it’s an issue between – I don’t think Axl would do it. I know we wouldn’t do it.

Gary: When was the last time you spoke to him?

Slash: The money’s been unreal.

Stern: Axl’s got fat. He got fat.

Slash: I don’t know what’s up with him.

Stern: Dude, come on.

Slash: It’s so - I’m not in that loop.

Stern: You’ve never run into him?  

Duff: No.

Slash: No, I haven’t seen him since the day I quit.

Quivers: What about that story we heard that Axl was performing somewhere and Slash was standing in the back of the room or something (?)?

Slash: No, no. It’s not that big a deal. I went to go see - New Year’s of a year before last, I guess it was, or a year before that. I went to go see him in Las Vegas and I wasn’t allowed in.

Stern: Oh!

Slash: It was a big thing around my entire building, just like to make sure I didn’t get in.  

Stern: Why did you go?

Slash: I went because I saw it – I was actually in a hotel in Las Vegas like right before that, like in December. And I saw an ad for Guns N’ Roses with a new logo and all the stuff, and it looked exciting-

Stern: That had to piss you off.

Slash: No, no. It looked exciting.

(Laughter)

Slash: It was like, I’m gonna go see Guns N’ Roses, the band that I used to be in, you know? (laughs)

Stern: You know I’m a big fan, but it does appear that Axl lost his hair and has some sort of hair weave-

Slash: I have no idea what-

Stern: And his voice seems to have been affected by something. It’s not as strong.

Gary: And it looks like he had plastic surgery on his face.

Quivers: Oh dear! Didn’t see any of it.

Stern: Yeah, right? Scott, did he?

Matt: (Laughs).

Scott: I don’t know. There’s something going on with the eyebrow part.

Duff: Yeah, yeah.

(Laughter)

Matt: I’ve been in the best seat in the house for three bands that I’ve been in, right? The Cult with Ian Astbury, a great frontman...

Stern: Right.

Matt: Axl Rose, great frontman...

Stern: Right. Great frontman.

Matt: Scott Weiland is the world’s greatest rock ‘n’ roll frontman right now.

Stern: He is great. He is great.

Matt: Okay? We’ve got Scott Weiland.

Slash: No, he’s-

Scott: You guys are making me blush.

Matt: We don’t need to talk about Axl anymore.

Stern: Come here, Scott, I’m gonna give you some anal right now.

Scott: (Laughs).

Stern: You’re gonna love it. You’re gonna love it.

Someone: Is he better than Justin Timberlake?

(Laughter)

Slash: A hundred times. He’s “expletive”.

Stern: Alright. So this is a real band, you guys are going to stay together.

Slash: That’s one thing we’ve picked up over the years.

Stern: Right. You guys are all happy to have found each other.

Slash: Yeah.

Stern: It is a love fest.

Slash: Something like that, I guess, you know...

Stern: Now the new album is out?

Slash: It’s not out yet. It comes out June 8th.

Stern: Alright. And what, is this going to be the single? The one you’re gonna perform today?

Slash: We’re gonna do an acoustic version of it.

Scott: Yeah, this one is the single right now – currently the single. It’s called Slither. And you know what, we’re gonna do it acoustically, like Slash was saying, but because I think we were unaware that we could actually do it electrically and...

Stern: You could do it any way you want, but you know, I think acoustically will be good, because I’ll tell you something. Something with this radio station, the less sort of – acoustic somehow always sounds better. I don’t know why.

Scott: I thought it worked out perfectly.

Slash: I couldn’t imagine a stack of Marshalls in here right now.

Stern: It always gets muddy or something. You know what I mean?

Matt: And it’s really early for that.

Stern: I don’t know, I would have dug it.

Slash: Little late for you, wouldn’t you think?

(Laughter)

Stern: Well, I think this is a great collection of musicians. I’m excited to hear your music, the Velvet Revolver album Contraband featuring the single Slither. What is Slither about? Does that mean... What does Slither mean exactly?

Scott: It’s got that sort of a dual meaning, but let’s just go with the... let’s just go with the sexual side of it.

Stern: Really? Alright.

Scott: Darkly sexual, something like that.

Stern: Available in stores on June 8. And there’s gonna be a whole Velvet Revolver tour. You gotta go to velvetrevolver.com. I think Slither must mean heroin or something. I'm pretty sure.

Quivers: Nah.

Stern: Yes. I believe I understand.

Quivers: Let’s go with the sex (laughs).    

Stern: We get tapped into something. Alright, I’ll leave you guys alone to do your thing. Let’s see, see if I can make this happen.

[Slither is performed]

Stern: Yeah, nice! Nice job, boys!

[Applause]

Stern: I’m gonna get in the band. I’m wasting my time here.

Quivers: (Laughs) It is the most fun thing to do for a living.

Stern: It is. Looks like fun when you guys were (?).  Scott, you weren’t having fun?

Scott: What’s that?

Stern: You didn’t seem like you were having fun (laughs).

Scott: Well, they didn’t have my mic on or, like...

Stern: That’s typical here.

Quivers: Yeah, you don’t expect things to work (laughs).

Stern: Your headphones weren’t working? Oh man! It sounded good.

Quivers: It was good!

Scott: I was kind of getting-

Stern: I heard it.

Matt: You sounded good, Scott.

Scott: If I did, it was all by-

Stern: By accident? (laughs)

Quivers: It’s a good thing you know the song, because we won’t help (laughs). We’ll never help you.

Stern: Alright. Who are you mad at? Because, don’t me mad at me. I can’t figure out how to make this stuff work either. We don’t really have it together.

Scott: No, no. It wasn’t you guys, actually.

Stern: No?

Slash: That’s the beauty of it, though.

Stern: Well, good, as long as you’re not mad at me.

Scott: Not you guys.

Stern: Yeah, I’m sure it’s my fault somehow.

Scott: No, it’s not. Don’t worry.

Stern: I don’t bust balls enough. Well, you guys sound good. I do wish you a lot of luck with this.

Scott: Oh, thank you.

Stern: Yes.

Slash: It’s doing really well.

Scott: Yeah, we just really happened.

Slash: I don’t know. We just started out, started playing before the record is out, and the crowd is responding like you wouldn’t believe.

Quivers: Oh, great!

Slash: It’s been a great start and it’s a great rock ‘n’ roll band.

Stern: And how do you write all this stuff? Like, Scott, you write the lyrics or something, or what?

Scott: Yeah, it’s a really collective thing though. We have a really strong work ethic. You know, we rehearse five days a week and, because of that, someone will come up with an idea, like a riff, and then we’ll all sit around and kind of jam on that, and kind of start whittling away at the idea, and then record what comes out of that riff - that riff will turn into a song and then recorded to DAT, and then I’ll throw it into...

Stern: I’m writing this down because I...

Quivers: You’re gonna put this together with your band.

Stern: I’m gonna do this with my band.

Scott: Then I’m gonna put lyrics and melody to it and then, you know, we’ll sort of all figure out, like, some harmony ideas and - you know, a lot of times, because Duff and Matt are such good singers as well, those guys will do the backup parts, the harmonies, and then we have a song.

Quivers: And where’s all this going on? Somebody got a studio?

Stern: Where do you go to? Like, Slash’s house?

Slash: North Hollywood or Burbank...

Duff: Over Burbank.

Matt: Slash’s got a warehouse where we all sort of...

Stern: You go to a warehouse?

Matt: Yeah.

Stern: It’s cool.

Scott: Yeah, we took it over. It’s a rehearsal space as well as a recording studio.

Stern: That’s cool. Did you bring chicks over there, too?  

(Laughter)

Robin: The wives, not now. The wives.

Scott: Not these days, man.

Stern: No?

Gary: Apparently only Matt gets to bring chicks (?).

[Inaudible cross talk]

Stern: You guys are nuts. You should have all been single, bringing chicks, three chicks to rehearsal.

Scott: You know, Matt is the prince of Hollywood.

(Laughter)

Stern: Yeah, I bet.

Slash: It’s true we all live vicariously through Matt.

Matt: You know, that Tommy Lee guy has nothing on me, man. Nothing (laughs).

Stern: Nice! I like that.

Matt: You know, Dave, our guitar player, our new guitar player, Dave – well, he’s not a new guitar player. He is our guitar player because we’re not new. We’re all new.

(Laughter)

Stern: It’s confusing being in a band.

Matt: We’re new, but we’re not, but he’s new (chuckles). But Dave got married before we went on tour.

Stern: That was smart.

(Laughter)

Matt: I said, “Dave, I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

Slash: We joked about that.

Matt: “You need to go out and experience it.”

Stern: You guys will screw up. Don’t worry. You’ll see. It will all be that way.

(Laughter)

Slash: I’ve done it, been there, I don’t think so.

Stern: We’ll see. It never gets old.

Slash: I've got enough on my plate with the one I have. I don’t think anybody’s gonna touch that (laughs).

Stern: Really? How many times a day do you have sex with her?

Slash: As many as possible.

Stern: Really? She’s that good, huh?

Slash: She’s wonderful.

Stern: And she does it all.

Slash: (Laughs).

Stern: Hey Dave, go ahead. You’re on the air.

Dave (caller): Hey, you’ve got the greatest rock ‘n’ roll band in front of you right now, dude. They haven’t even put out a record, put out one single so far – I guess, I haven’t picked it up yet, but I’m gonna see you guys on Friday. I can’t wait.

Stern: Yeah, where is this show on Friday?

Slash: At Roseland.

Duff: Wednesday.

Stern: Roseland? I should be there.

Quivers: It’s Wednesday. That guy is gonna be late.

Stern: It’s Wednesday.

Dave (caller): No, no, I’m gonna see them in Philly.

Quivers: Oh, in Philly? Alright.

Dave (caller): So guys, I can’t wait to see you on Friday and I’ll try to shake your hand or whatever at some point, but-

Duff: Yeah, we’re gonna rock, man. We’ll go for the jugular on this tour.

Stern: Alright, good. That’s good, alright. Let’s go to Mike. Hey, come on.

Mike (caller): Hey now!

Stern: Hey now, Mike!

Mike (caller): What’s up, brother?

Stern: What’s going on? Ask your question.

Mike (caller): These guys are amazing, dude, just amazing. I mean, no arguments, no fights, no nothing. (?)

Stern: Well, wait. They haven’t gone on tour yet.

(Laughter)

Slash: Oh yeah, we have.

Stern: Oh yeah, but it’s the first-

Mike (caller): Are you gonna give tickets for Wednesday’s show or what?

Stern: I don’t know. I don’t have any tickets.

Mike (caller): Come on!

Stern: Oh, go buy some tickets these days! You want money? What’s the matter with you?

(Laughter)

Stern: Yeah, Ron, go ahead. Yes.

Ron (caller): Yeah. Still on hold.

Quivers: You’re talking to Howard now.

Ron (caller): Oh, yeah?

Stern: Yes. Go ahead, say something.

Ron (caller): Excellent. Quick question: What’s gonna be with the new concerts when you guys go out?

(Giggle)

Quivers: What does that mean?

Scott: We’re out on tour right now.

Stern: But what’s your question?

Ron: My question is, being a huge Guns N’ Roses fan and a huge STP fan, this is like almost a dream come true that you guys would get together after thinking that you guys are both gone.

Stern: So what do you want to know? If they’re gonna play songs from each band?

Ron (caller): Exactly.

Stern: Yeah, what about that? Scott, you’re gonna do some Stone Temple Pilots or is that forbidden?

Scott: You know what, actually we do. We play a couple Guns N’ Roses songs and a couple STP songs.

Stern: Oh, okay.

Scott: Yeah.

Stern: And they cover a couple of ABBA tunes, too, which is a surprise on the tour.

(Laughter)

Slash: Poorly, though.

Stern: Yes. On purpose. Eric, you’re on the air.  You know what this is like with you guys coming together? It’s almost like if Pam Anderson and Carmen Electra merged into one person. You know what I mean?

(Laughter)

Slash: Wow. That’s a first. It’s pretty heavy.

Stern: Yeah. You can quote me on that on your album.

Someone: That would be one smart chick.

Stern: Eric, go ahead. You’re on the air.

Eric (caller): Hey Scott (?).

[Inaudible cross talk]

Eric (caller): Hey Slash. I want to congratulate you boys for sticking up after rehab, man. Nice work and you guys have done awesome.

(Laughter)

Slash: Yeah, that went by alright.

Mike (caller): It’s surely good to hear you guys play.

Stern: Alright. Tommy Lee, you’re on the air.

Quivers: Tommy Lee?

Caller: Drea DiMatteo got whacked on the Sopranos!

Stern: Oh!

[Noise and laughter]

Stern: That’s not true, Robin. Let’s go to Chris. Chris, go ahead.

Chris (caller): Hey now, Howard!

Stern: Hey brother. Go ahead, real quick.

Chris (caller): How you doing buddy? I love these guys and it’s important to tell you, oh my God, don’t do 'shrooms [says something about doing 'shrooms and cocaine]

Stern: They don’t do ‘shrooms.

Chris (caller): [continues rumbling and yells something]

Stern: They don’t do ‘shrooms, these guys.

Slash: No, last time I did ‘shrooms, it was a nightmare.

Stern: It’s from the earth, man. That’s-

Slash: Yeah, right?

Stern: I don’t understand what’s going on here.

Gary: Is everybody allowed to drink or some people are not even allowed to drink?

Stern: Scott, you can’t even drink?

Scott: No drinking.  

Stern: Oh great...

Scott: No, the rest of us... Not at all.

Slash: Howard, you’ve known me long enough. I don’t drink anywhere near as I...

Stern: No, you don’t.

Quivers: You were actually great to that.

Slash: Our first meeting was on... yeah.

Stern: You were wasted.

Slash: Yeah.

Stern: Yeah. Well...

Someone: Can I ask Duff something? When your pancreas blows up, what happens? Like how does that get repaired?

Duff: If you’re lucky enough for it to repair itself, which I was.

Someone: Oh, okay.

Duff: But a lot of guys die from it.

Stern: See, I heard you killed a 14-year-old boy and took his pancreas.

[Laughter – Cross talk]

Slash: He’d be still drinking to this day, I guess.

Stern: Yes Jennifer, you’re on the air.

Jennifer (caller): Hello?

Stern: Yes.

Jennifer (caller): Yes. Oh, I don’t know who I’m more excited to talk to, Howard. You or the guys.

Stern: You’re more excited to talk to me.

(Laughter)

Slash: Howard is infinitely more exciting.

Stern: I’m way more exciting.

Jennifer (caller): Well, thank you for taking my call. I don’t really have a question, just a statement. I’ve been a fan of all of you guys respectively for a lot of years, and I think it’s amazing that you guys have joined together for this project.

Scott: Thank you.

Jennifer (caller): Each of you are a musical genius in your own right.

Stern: Thank you.

(Laughter)

Jennifer (caller): Also specifically, Scott, I wanted to thank you. I met you in Soho on Saturday night and you were nice enough to stop and give me an autograph, which is going to make me very popular with my students. I’m a professor at a performing arts school.

Stern: She must be a hot chick if (?)

Slash: Professor of what?

Jennifer (caller): English.

Stern: “That’s a vagina.”

(Laughter)

Stern: Are you a hot chick?

Jennifer (caller): Um, I don’t know if I’m in a position to answer that question.

Stern: How much do you weigh? I’ll tell you.

Slash: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Get into that position and then we’ll ask that question again.

Stern: How much do you weigh?

Slash: Yeah.

Jennifer (caller): 125.

Stern: 125. And how tall are you?

Jennifer (caller): 5.2.

Stern: Hmm...

Someone: Now, you have to be 6.4 for 125.

(Laughter)

Jennifer (caller): Howard, I think I’m too old for you anyway.

Stern: How old are you?

Jennifer (caller): 29.

Stern: You’re too old for Scott, definitely.

(Laughter)

Stern: Scott, do you often stop in and sign autographs or only for hot chicks?

Scott: No, you know what? I think it’s fine to sign autographs as long as it’s not for a whole entire crowd.

Stern: No, honestly?

Jennifer (caller): Yeah, he was wonderful. He was – you know, there’s always that one rock star that you say “I’d love to meet,” and I had the opportunity to do that and he was very sweet, and I thank you for that. And I wish all of you guys luck with this project. It’s amazing.

Stern: Alright, baby. Thank you.

Jennifer (caller): Okay, bye.

Stern: That’s the professor.

(Laughter)

Slash: She’s about to teach English in about half an hour.

(Laughter)

Stern: That’s right. What is it, Sam?

Sam (caller): Yeah, I’ve just got a question for Duff and Slash. I’m a huge GN’R fan. I love you guys, I admire and respect you. I’m also rooting for the new Guns N’ Roses though, and the question I have is, if you guys are moving on, why are you guys suing Axl now?  

Stern: Yeah, why are you suing Axl? Are you guys suing Axl?

Slash: You know what, I don’t even want to get into that.

Stern: I do. And Duff does.

Slash: Go for it, Duff.

Duff: Yeah, I mean, I think it’s been kind of throwing a skew of what exactly we are doing. To just kind of outline, it’s... we all own the songs. We never sold our publishing.

Stern: Right.

Duff: And Slash and I are actually the only remaining members of Guns N’ Roses. And we’ve been trying to use the songs, like, for good movies, Black Hawk Down, and it got blocked by Axl.

Stern: By Axl.

Duff: Yeah. So we’re just trying to get the rights to use our songs.

Stern: How do you do that, if he’s got control... if he’s got one of the votes?

Duff: He doesn’t.

Stern: He doesn’t?

Duff: Yeah.

Stern: By the way, didn’t you guys write all the songs?

Duff: Yeah.

Stern: And Axl basically got some credit?

(Laughter)

Slash: Well, no, no. I mean, all things considered, it’s just - it’s a long story, but basically he’s sort of cockblocked everything.

Stern: Oh really?

Slash: It’s gotten to the point of going, “You know what, we appreciate your artistic stance on what goes where, but this is ridiculous.”

Stern: How does he block it though? I mean, if you guys-

Slash: You know what-

Sam (caller): Alright, I’ve got one more point. Hey Howard?

Stern: Yeah.

Sam (caller): I’ve got one more point. Just what happened to Scott right now in the studio, happened to Axl at the MTV Awards, in his defense. Everyone’s ragging on his performance at the MTV Awards. Exactly what happened to Scott, happened to Axl. He couldn’t-

Stern: Oh, he couldn’t hear himself.

Sam (caller): Yeah.

Stern: Yeah, I don’t know, but Scott sounded good.

(Laughter)

Stern: Yeah Stein, go ahead.

Stein (caller): Hey now!

Stern: Hey now!

Stein (caller): How you doing?

Stern; Hurry up, last question!

Stein (caller): That sounded unbelievably sick!

Stern: Well these guys are gonna go out on tour, they want you to come see them, they want you to buy the album...

Stein (caller): Can I ask Slash a question?

Stern: Yes.

Stein (caller): Alright, I’m 33. Just met this 19-year-old, unbelievably gorgeous blonde.

Stern: Alright. Now you’re asking something he knows about.

Quivers: Yeah, he can tell you about this.

Stern: Not about lawsuits. Yeah, go ahead.

Stein (caller): What do you do here, Slash? Is it okay? Can I bring her to the show with me on Wednesday?

Stern: Is it okay for a 33-year-old to date a 19-year-old, Slash?

Slash: She’s over 18. It’s fine, man (laughs).

Stern: There you go. There’s a guy who knows.

Slash: She just can’t buy a pack of cigarettes for you.

Quivers: We have a new segment: sex and Slash.

Stein (caller): Hey Slash...

Gary: What if she’s gonna be 18 in like a month? Is that okay?

Stern: He’ll have to wait.

Slash: I don’t know. I don’t think you can get away with that.

Stein (caller): Slash, can I get a pair of tickets to bring her to the show and hook you up with her, too?

Slash: I don’t have any. I’m sorry.

Stern: I don’t either. Alright.

Quivers: But he’s the new “Dear Abby” of rock. Come on. Ask him a question here (laughs).

(Laughter)

Slash: You got your information from me.

Stern: Well you guys, look. I’m happy for you. I’m happy you found each other. I’ve known Scott for a long time, he’s come and done the show and I love him.

Slash: You gotta come down to a gig.

Stern: I’m gonna come.

Duff: Come Wednesday night.

Stern: I can’t go out Wednesdays.

Quivers: You gotta play on a weekend.

Stern: Play on a weekend.

Matt: Hey Howard, I’ve got a gig for you.

Stern: Alright.

Matt: If you play with the band, play cowbell.

Quivers: Cowbell (laughs).

Stern: Cowbell? Why do you insult me?

(Laughter – Cross talk)

Slash: Did you see that (?)

Scott: Cowbell is a very important part of this band, especially on one of the Guns N’ Roses songs.

Stern: The only song that cowbell ever worked on was Mississippi Queen.

Slash: No, no, no. It was Don’t Fear the Reaper (laughs). Remember?

Stern: Oh, that’s right. It had it in there, too.

Matt: Come on, Howard.

Stern: Well I’m insulted. I wouldn’t-

Matt: We need cowbell on It’s So Easy. We’re gonna play It’s So Easy.

Scott: Yeah.

Someone: Who?

Scott: Velvet Revolver does.

Stern: Oh, that I could do.

Slash: There would be nothing cooler than see you walk out and just play cowbell.

Stern: You know what, I don’t mind playing cowbell. It’s just what do you do with the rest of yourself during the song, you know what I mean?

Slash: You just play cowbell.

Stern: It’s hard to get into it.

Someone: You drink.

Scott: And you can sing on the chorus of the song.

Stern: You don’t want me on that.

Quivers: You’ve wanted to do that all along!

Stern: I dunno. Well you guys, listen, I wish you a lot of luck. You guys are all good guys. You deserve success. You’ve already had success. I guess you deserve success again. Velvet Revolver album, Contraband; certainly an appropriate title.

Slash: Isn’t it, though?

Stern: Yeah, it sort of follows you guys around, Contraband.

Scott: And good luck with your war against the FCC.

Stern: Ah, forget it man. I’m going down.

Slash: You will prevail, though.

Stern: I don’t know about that.

Slash: Yeah, you will.

Scott: Trust me, I’ve been battling with them as well during the setup and the launch of this record.

Stern: They didn’t want any curse words?

Scott: Ah man, you know what, I have never seen so much censorship in the entire ten years with STP.

Stern: Wow. Yeah, I know. We’ve taken 20 steps backward. And who cares anyway? Why is everyone getting so crazy?

Slash: All of a sudden, right?

Stern: Right.

(Cross talk)

Scott: It’s not just with the curse words. It’s like, when we were editing our video, and, you know, it just goes on and on.

Quivers: All forms of expression.

Matt: We’re not allowed to have bodies in our videos without heads on them.

Stern: You’re kidding me.

Matt: Like you can have the body with a chick, right? But you have to have the head attached.

Stern: Why is that?

Matt: I have no idea (laughs).

Slash: It’s only females, by the way.

Quivers: You can cut off a guy’s head.

Someone: It’s degrading.

Slash: That’s how horror movies are done.

Duff: You couldn’t just show, like, an ass. You know, it had to be like the ass and her head.

Quivers: You’re kidding!

Duff: It’s important.

Quivers: Wow!

Scott: I thought there is a double standard, because in hip hop videos, of course-

Slash: It’s all allowed.

Stern: Anything goes. It’s all about the ass.

Scott: Yeah.

Quivers: And no heads.

Stern: Right. Hey, are you guys angry with the Red Hot Chili Peppers?

Slash: No.

Stern: Are you feuding with them?

Duff: Why?

Stern: I don’t know. Some guy called in it. You are?

Band members: No.

Stern: You wanna start a feud?

(Laughter)

Someone: He said (?)

Scott: Let’s get something going.

Slash: That’s something we weren’t aware of.

Scott: It’s funny though. I might have an idea where that came up, where that began. We were doing a photo shoot – I don’t remember which magazine it was, but it was a month ago – and the photographer was trying to get us to act crazy, and we were like, “You know what, man? We’re just not that kind of a band.”

Stern: “We are not crazy.”

Scott: Yeah.

Slash: Is that what I think?

Scott: And he said, “Let’s just act zany” and we were like, “You know what, we’re not the Chili Peppers.”

Stern: Aahh... Okay.

Scott: So perhaps that’s where it sort of began. Somebody on the-

Stern: Somebody heard that.

Scott: They heard that.

Matt: I mean, there’s certain rock poses you do. You know, we’re more like the serious rock-

Stern: And you kind of sit there.

Matt: And they’re like all zany and...

Quivers: Right. They’re jumping up and down...

Stern: You guys don’t get naked and put a sock on your penis?

Slash: No, no. (?) It’s sort of let’s get this over with. Scott’s great at it, because he looks exactly – he just looks good from this (?).

Stern: You love the f-word.

(Cross talk)

Quivers: I was gonna say, Howard, if they ever take away curse words, Slash will be mute.

Stern: I don’t think Slash has had a sentence on the air yet, because everything gets bleeped.

Matt: Isn’t this thing, the new FCC-

(Cross talk)

Slash: You guys have a delay though, right?

Stern: We do, we do.

(Cross talk)

Stern: Alright, listen. I’m gonna... Listen. Thank you guys for coming in.

Gary: Hey Howard.

Stern: Yeah.

Someone: I have one more quick question. This is kind of a cliché with bands, but how did you come up with the name, Velvet Revolver? How did that come up?

Slash: It was a very last-minute thing. It started with the name “Revolver,” and then Scott came in with “Velvet,” and we put the two together and there you have it.

Someone: You just liked it.

(Laughter)

Slash: It looks good on paper, right? (laughs)

Stern: Is anybody going to relapse within the next year?

Band members: Whoa! Oooh!

Someone: Hey Howard, is everybody still rich from their other bands? Like everyone still got tons of money?

Stern: Does everybody still have tons of money?

Someone: Like, Duff, could you never work again if you didn’t want to?

Scott: Duff’s the richest, actually.

Stern: Is he really?

Quivers: That’s why he went to finance school! (laughs)

Scott: He’s excellent. It’s true.

Stern: He might be too rich for this band.

Duff: You know, like, playing rock ‘n’ roll has never been about dough. We’re not doing this again. It’s about – I’m not – we’re like the pure musician guys, you know.

Stern: Scott, you gotta have millions, right?

Scott: I’ve got a couple of houses...

Stern: Yeah, right? You gotta be loaded. Slash, forget about it, right?

Slash: (Laughs).

(Laughter)

Stern: Unbelievable.

Someone: How much did you lose to the first wife?

Stern: Oh yeah.

Slash: Oh yeah. You know, I sort of go along the way that Duff goes. It was never about the money. So I know what I’ve got, but I’ve spent a lot of it along the way, so-

Stern: You’ve got more than (?)

Slash: So it’s not really an issue.

Stern: You’ve gotta have more than 10 million.

Slash: I’d like to think I’m worth that.

Stern: Right. Wow... And Matt’s just pissed, cuz-

Matt: (?)

(Cross talk)

Scott: It’s amazing to think how much money is actually spent foolishly though, you know?

Slash: I tried to give it away.

Stern: I can only imagine what you’ve spent.

Scott: And it’s that when you’re young, and you’re a kid, and you make it – and all of us made it in music-

Stern: What did you do foolishly?

Scott: When you’re basically a kid, you know, and you don’t... It’s just-

Stern: What did you spend money on that was really dumb? Besides the drugs.

Scott: I mean, it’s like, when you’re young and wasted, you just spend money on stupid things, you practically give it away.

Stern: Wow.

Scott: And now, like, sort of doing this all over and beginning of having success with experience, you have the opportunity to kind of do it smart – you know, to be smart about it.  

Stern: Right.

Slash: When you’re young, and wasted, and rich, the people around you tell you to go out and spend it on this, that and the other, so that you don’t pay attention to the fact that they’re spending your money as well.

Stern: Right.

Duff: Right, exactly.

Matt: I’ve never spent my money on drugs, man. People always gave us drugs for free.

Stern: Right. That’s a trick.

Matt: They wanted to hang out with you. So people say, “Oh, you blew all your money on drugs.” I mean, that’s-

Scott: It’s only when you are wasted.

Stern: I gotta figure what you should do with your money. I gotta figure if your habit could be satisfied on about $150,000 a year.

Scott: It’s what you do with your money when you are wasted.

Stern: Right.

Slash: Yeah, it’s exactly that. On top of that, they never give you enough drugs for free (laughs). You gotta buy some, too.

(Laughter)

Quivers: You know, you do get greedy.

Stern: You guys could afford drugs. That’s the shame of it all.

Slash: Yeah, it’s amazing how that works.

Stern: Keith Richards, I mean, that was probably hardly any money for him.

Slash: That was a different time.

Stern: Right.

Quivers: He’s still high!

Stern: Listen, we gotta go. Everyone check out Velvet Revolver’s tour dates. Go to velvetrevolver.com. Thank you guys for coming in, and Contraband is the new album coming out... June 8th. Alright. We’ll be back right after this.

-----------------------

[After show interviews outside the studio:

Scott, how did it go in there?

Scott: Rock ‘n’ roll show. Early in the morning.

You guys thought it went alright in there?

Slash: All things considered, if everybody else thought it was alright, then it was alright (laughs). We didn’t know what we were doing (laughs).

And Howard wanted to bring up some old stuff about GN’R and Stone Temple Pilots?

Slash: Yeah.

You guys didn’t mind talking about that?

Slash: It’s alright to an extent, you know, as long as it doesn’t take too long and it doesn’t get too involved.

Is it better coming from Howard than from some other interviewers?

Slash: You know, all things considered, it’s a lot more acceptable to listen to Howard’s questions and try and ascertain where he’s going than it is with anybody else.]